STOLEN :-(

Even when you've got the back wheel locked to yer frame, some asshole in a truck can come along and steal your bike.

kids.

also, you know what's a real shame? when parents take a perfectly good kid and make them stupid. that's sad.

you know i never feel like saying anything when i actually have the time to. what's up with that. i just don't have the memory capacity to remember anything at all these days, maybe because I don't really have a job and my brain has started to turn to mush lately without the stimulation of any sort of challenge...just constant reminder that I hate just about everything and everyone...not you though. If you're actually reading this you're a friend, honest. yep, pretty much hate everything...but whatever, life is but a dream...with advertising.

all this technology!!!

this is a test of your amateur blogger...this is only a test. I've been inondated with all kinds of technology lately and I'm trying to sort it out...it hurts my brain. I don't know why I think I should be using all this stuff...I mean, I do spend a lot of time on this little iBook of mine and I enjoy making that experience better, more functional, and smoother. Is it working? Is it worth it? What is the point of this great distraction. Of course you could posit the big philosophical questions like, "is it bringing us closer together or causing more isolation?", "is it helping us to adapt, or causing some type of social devolution?". I sometimes feel like I'm just missing it all together. I have a friend over at NerdSavant who is my official technology consultant, guru, make-me-feel-stupid guy. I get a lot of the "enhancements" from him, and he is generally really excited about this stuff, which is cool.

reconnecting

there's something about a fixed gear bicycle that allows you to completely ignore the elements (a little wool doesn't hurt either). It was about twenty degrees with a wind chill this morning, but I was lovin' the ride in to the store. Sliding around on the fresh snow in front of the house, and my favorite part of the ride; this little 100 yard stretch along the Allegheny (that's the 40th Street Bridge there). I duck through a bit of a park, across the railroad and another block beside the tracks. It's great. It certainly beats sitting in some heated car on the parkway for 2 hours everyday.

all this samsara

sometimes i can't handle all this worldly shit! it's pretty amazing how many people are out there in this world, all over the place. without seeming trite, it just blows my mind in an almost crippling way. And the sadness that I feel when I reach for the truth that I know is out there, comes in the form of the realization that there are a handful of people out there that I've met, spoken to, "know", that may actually have the foggiest idea of what I'm talking about. And then there is the notion of an entire society that's completely based on it...being wiped out. Somewhere in the middle...everyone else. Literally, everyone else.

Aside: Currently Goodyear Blimp Overhead!

Is it possible that the man who actually has the answers was a prince who went and sat down under a tree? Is it possible that when I close my eyes and breathe, it gets closer? Is it possible that me, a simple man who live in capitalism, who works for a living, who has cats, and a fiance, and a car, and lots of bikes, could possibly, in this lifetime, ever get even slightly closer to what he knows is truly enlightment?

Sometimes...i feel as though I'm not really trying hard enough.

bomb scare

being as i'm finally an adult, i almost never get yelled at like a child. aside from the occasional voice raising argument with someone (generally my better half) I haven't had the opportunity to really be made to feel insignificant, like i'm being "bad". So yestereday i'm on my way to work, and super siked cause I just re-built my bike into a fixed gear and was off for my maiden commute, all fifteen minutes of it. (8 1/2 of them uphill!) Nearing the top of the hill, and passing a giant new hospital construction site I encounter a jersey barrier and a cop car, oh and an angry, arm waving police officer. She yells, "you can't go this way you have to go around!" So I take the nearest side street a block over. This particular section of Pittsburgh is quite steep and most of the streets are one way up or one way down. So, not wanting to divert my commute much more then I have already I continue on the sidewalk of a one way down street. As I get to the top of the hill where the street comes to a "t", I find my self smack in the middle of what I soon realize is a bomb threat that has been called in to hospital construction site!! Immediately, another cop which surprising enough could have been the same one from before (same physical description at least) starts screaming at me. Now I do understand that I was in a cordoned off area, roughly twenty feet from the big, strange looking truck that says bomb unit on it. But I was faced with a left and right decision, there was no straight option. So, I go left, the way I would have gone had there been no police activity. This was clearly the incorrect choice. Cop "B" was not amused and continues to yell...reasoning with her was certainly not an option. So I turn right and ride around the corner to take an alternate route to work...nuff said. Then of course the construction workers who have gotten themselves an oh so convenient half day off, lay into me. "Hey buddy, what's yer problem didn't you see all dem cop cars!" Fuckers. So i give'em the metal sign and pedal on to work....what a way to start your day. Oh, and guess what they turned up at the construction site. Not a damn thing. Oh, the power of a telephone call.

i likes bikes

so, i thought i'd finally let the world in on a little secret. i have a secret obsession that occupies my mind daily and nightly like cats think about mice. it's bikes, i love them. and fortunately i'm not alone. its clearly something that makes a lot of people happy. and i'm clearly not feeling all that poetic about it today, just thought i'd put it down, for posterity. thats all.

Death of a Disco Dancer

Anna and I used to spend a lot of time in this little ride. But then time got the best of it. Even being towed away it's still a bad ass ride...
RIP Sidney.

Timing is everything

Every once in a while some coincidence comes around and, even if it's a real small one, it can really freak me out. Quite some time ago I spoke to a long time native Pittsburgher about working up a new tattoo for me. And he kinda fell of the earth after I gave him some preliminary desgin ideas, ie. this etching. So I wasn't really thinking much of it, not hearing from the kid and all. We've all got so many irons in the fire, I just figured I'd getting around to dropping him a line eventually. Which is what I was going to do this morning, you know, just to say what's up and all. And before I could get to the "compose mail" button, there's an email from him! I mean, I know its not really that big a deal, shearly a coincidence, but stuff like that always gets to me a little more then you'd think.
One of things that always gets to me, and one of the concepts I had on a list of things that may be incorporated into this tattoo design is the vast number of human beings that exists in the world. I think that its something that people often take for granted. Like, "well duh! there's like millions of people in the world. It's like always been that way!" But the simple fact that there are so many souls out there, isn't it more amazing that coincidence if even a possibility? It would seem by that logic that either everything is coincidence or everything is meant for a reason. right? I mean I guess that doesn't really leave any room for gray area. But really, it's all about shading anyway.

just something.

not much to say today, but I thought I'd throw a little post up anyway. Not sure who reads this thing, if anyone, but if you haven't checked it out for a while, there's new stuff in extra extra, and a couple of new links. Definitely check out TokyoPlastic if you havn't already. Especially if you've got some nice ear-goggles.

down the well

I've always been slightly amazed at how many functionally insane people there are out there in the world. And I'm not talking about the folks that "just aren't like me" cause that's like 98% of the rest of the world. And that's fine, 'it takes all kinds'. No, I'm talking about the people who have no idea how truly crazy they are, and everyone else knows it. There's the guys trying not to hitch-hike (which is strange enough in the city) but to actually flag down cars for a ride. There's the people who talk to themselves, fall asleep outside businesses. And these people are actually allowed to have bank accounts, cell phones, cars, the more I think about it, the more afraid I am to leave my house.

Deliberate...

as i typed that word I realized it has two different meanings (if you don't count the fact the I may have misspelled it). The way I see it, the only way you're ever really going to accomplish anything is to be deliberate. Everything else that may have happened, didnt' happen, could have happened, it's just in your mind (I often times re-realize that I am in fact a Buddhist and why, in fact, this is so) If you don't do something deliberately, it is just not going to happen. Take, for example, walking up the stairs, this may be a stupid example, and may touch of something metaphysical; but if do not walk up the stairs, I will not walk up the stairs, even though I know that I could, I know what it would be like, and and know what the consequences will be.
yes i realize also that this is a convoluted example, but I wanted a precursor to what I'm actually talking about, what we're all always talking about...life. I know if these posts that I always try to keep to the abstract, no specific names, no specific examples, and I like that...but I guess what I'm really getting at is that there will remain a connection between people that will eventually no longer be deliberate. Whether it is family, friends, co-workers, when there is no communication, there is no "deliberate", but there is still something...
memory? grasping? history? there is something. but it is different to each of us. it is no longer something that is happening, it is something that is. and when does it become deliberate again? when is it something, when does it actualize? within the constancy of this world with email, phone, textmessage, what even constitutes action? What is deliberate and what is residual? What simply does not exist for one when it is obvious to another. How can we go back...we must move forward and we must be deliberate.

thisisnotme

thisisnotme

I was sitting around passing time, thinking of something to blog about cause this is one of the most boringest days I can remember. So I was doing the whole "next blog" "next blog thing. (look up and to your right). and I came across this one. (incidentally, half the blogs that you linke to are in a different language, so some of them may be interesting too, but I don't read arabic, or german, or anything but English really {which is also a misnomer, and a bit of an insult to the English so lets just say I speak and read 'merican.}) But yeah, I came across this one, and my days suddenly felt even more...conservative? I'm not sure really how to put it, but I guess in this day and age you can instantly make yourself famous, if you want to. So, nice blog miss Grace Trisha Tng, whoever the hell you are. It looks like you're pretty much making a go of it, having fun, taking' lots of pictures, and generally living it up. I can dig it, can you?

halloween, the public, and capitalism

"its the most wonderful time of the..." wait that's christmas. the trick or treat thing is a whole different story. its a clever holiday isnt' it? teenage mothers pushing strollers house to house with a pillow case in hand collecting candy from the working class. kids whose costume is an oversized hoodie and a grocery bag. It's great! The only thing worse then a made up holiday, is a made up holiday that gets bastardized into a "gimme some free shit" freeforall. But with all the morons that make up "the public" its no wonder I'm even able to leave my house half the time, let alone on a day like halloween. Sure there's the folks that painstakingly create their handmade costumes, get their monster mash on at late night parties, and really get into the spirit. but they're few and far between. And honestly...I'm beginning to lose faith. Maybe I'm old, maybe I don't get out enough, or out to the right places, where the spirit is right and the public actually has an IQ over 85. Is that asking too much? Perhaps I'm an elitist (and actually I know I probably am) Maybe none of this has anything to do with Halloween. In fact now I kinda feel bad about taking it out on the holiday in the first place. Perhaps the public is just best left alone...its just that...they're...everywhere!

Holy Crap! I'm actually not dead!

It was all but forgotten to me, this whole blogging thing. Who really cares what I have to say. Blogging is almost a cliche this days, there seems to be so many of them out there, politicians have them, teenagers have them, almost famous people have them, not famous people have them. Does anyone actually read these things? I think the bottom line is, it doesn't really matter. It's been an entire year without any posts, I must have been in some type of stasis, hibernation, coma, something. Hopefully, those of you out there that read this joint still remember my name and know that you're still on the short list for the after party.
I don't really even know what I've been doing. When you think about an entire year passing you start thinking about acctually getting something accomplished, setting milestones, and looking back on what you have done, what has happened, thoughts you've had, feelings, attitudes. It starts to make this blogging think really kinda worth it. I'm almost a little sad that it has been a year. And what a year! Holy crap a lot has happened. 38th Street is no more. It's Carnegie Street, and we own that bitch! There's been a lot that has gone into this house already, and we're still working like crazy people, well at least slighty deranged people. Building a whole new kitchen from scratch. That's not an easy job, that's for sure. Hopefully by the end of the year we'll be done. Goddamn, once I starting thinking about it, I have a whole years worth of catching up to do! That's a lot, I don't even know where to begin. I may even have to start a whole new blog...for pictures! Shit...I think that's gonna have to be a whole 'nother project. This is just a prelude then. We'll take it slow and steady, and persistant this time. No yearlong breaks in the works. Just steady, deliberate progress.

I can't believe its thursday. what a week. and it's not even over yet! I know there's things i've been meaning to post, like looking for houses sucks. It's so hard to tell the difference between being busy and just feeling busy. I guess it's kinda dependent on your stress level. There's gotta be some sort of equation there. (high stress:feeling busy::low stess:being busy.)
Dunno, basically it's crazy all the time. I'm starting to realize that life never really mellow's out. Not that I want to be boring, but at 27 years old, I got a lot of shit goin' on, if you know what I'm sayin'. Mad peeps be havin' babies, buyin' houses, startin' up businesses. It's a crazy time. Just gotta get used to it.

sunday morning whew... i made it.

it seems so long ago, country night. but it was a few weeks ago now. i found myself deep into enemy territory. never, in all my years did i feel so out of place, (okay, i don't have all that many 'years', but i've got a few under my belt). fortunately, there are things like jeagerbombs.

just one thing about country night. unless you're a glutton for punishment, don't do it.

no matter how hard I try, I am not a morning person. what an eerie, unnatural part of the day. thank goodness for coffee, it's really the only thing that makes it bareable, especially when someone are your street is using some type of evil, circular cutting device at 6 o' clock in the morning. Who are these people! Don't they have some sleeping to do? I mean, for Pete's sake, the sun isn't even up yet!! Bastards.

This morning I am thankful for patience, and espresso.

despite my often slacker-esque appearence, and general apptitude for complaining I do actually consider myself a hard worker. which is the kiss of death if you beleive there is no duality. okay...i know that didn't make any sense, but read a little suzuki and you may see where I'm coming from.

but anyway, where i was trying to get at was that I don't generally shy away from a solid day of physical labor. that said...after participating in said physical labor for an extended period of time, the downside begins to show. I'm dog tired. I could very easily drop over onto any horizontal soft thing this very moment.

and now for something completely different.